Recharger The Dog does not love everything this city has to offer. He does not enjoy fine dining or long walks on the beach.
Sunsets bore him.
The West Side bike path really bores him.
Why someone with a blog would post a photo of a restaurant meal baffles him.
The phrase “Yankee pride” sickens him.
Bullies, snobs, English-firsters, The TV show “Friends,” Dennis Miller’s jokes, gratuitous cruelty, religious hypocrites, animal-rights hypocrites, vegetarian hypocrites, people who describe themselves as “spiritual,” and people who are rude to waiters occupy Recharger’s lowest level of hell.
Recharger likes the following: good stories told in ungrammatical English. Finding Perfect People and popping their balloons. Revealing to the world the asshole Derek Jeter is. Vita creamed herring and French fries with garlic mayonaise. Hedge fund managers in jail. The last stop on subway lines. The 1999 New York Mets. People who make things with their hands. Comparing his income to the income of big hedge-fund managers. Penthouse apartments with 360 views. Cartoons drawn by immature teens. Mocking “good” schools. Raymond Carver, Dennis Cooper, Jay Gatsby, Monteverdi. Speculating about what an earthquake would do to New York City. Photographs of the Rockaways and other end-of-world neighborhoods. Good people who never get their names in the news. Driving past City College in the fog at 3 am. Couples fighting in public. Creepy apartments. Recipes from pasta boxes. Dominican Little Leaguers. Stationery stores. Street intersections with five corners.