To celebrate New York City Meatloaf Appreciation Day, we are re-printing the famed 20 reasons why meatloaf is better than sex list.
20 Reasons Why Meatloaf is Better Than Sex
1. After eating meatloaf, you don’t fake small talk.
2. Meatloaf can’t get pregnant
3. Meatloafs don’t snore
4. After eating meatloaf, you don’t have to marry it, spend the rest of your life pretending to be interested in it, then die wondering what you missed.
5. Meatloaf tastes good.
6. You can eat two meatloafs at the same time.
7. When eating meatloaf, you don’t have to fantasize about eating another meatloaf.
8. You don’t have to take a meatloaf to dinner to eat it.
9. Meatloaf doesn’t make you come and lose your appetite.
10. You can eat meatloaf and watch TV at the same time.
11. Meatloaf doesn’t care if you have a small tongue.
12. Meatloaf doesn’t care if you ate another meatloaf yesterday.
13. Before eating meatloaf, you don’t have to wrap your tongue in latex sprayed with nonoxynol-9
14. You can hide hard-boiled eggs in meatloaf
15. Before eating a meatloaf, you don’t have to bathe and dress up.
16. White girls don’t get pissed when you eat Asian meatloaf
17. Sometimes Johnny Depp’s meatloaf is uglier than yours.
18. Jewish meatloaf can look pretty good.
19 Meatloaf doesn’t leave mysterious blisters on your penis.
20. Meatloaf ALWAYS tastes good.